Skip to main content

Linky party, why I became a nurse(ing student)


Ok since this is nursing week there are lots of people posting why they became a nurse, and even though I'm just a nursing student I thought I'd play along with Anna's question of "Why I became a nurse".

If you are new followers of this blog & you don't read my other blog then this will be new for you.

On May 2, 2008 I got a phone call at work from one of my mother's really good friends saying that my mother was in the hospital & that she was almost non-responsive & that my sister & I should come right away.  (We live about an hour from where my mom lived.)  So, we immediately went to the hospital where my mom was in the ER.  She was in a stupor, barely responsive and we weren't sure what was wrong.  After many tests the doctors told us that she had a huge tumor the size of a lemon on her cerebellum and that it needed to be removed immediately.

Now, some background.  My mom had been sick for several years from what she said was depression.  She had basically become a recluse in her home & had visibly aged considerably from a boisterous, vibrant woman to a pale skinned, timid homebody.  In 2007 there was a mass found on one of her lungs which was biopsied & came back benign, but a 2nd opinion was never obtained.

So that day when the doctor said she needed surgery it was a no brainer, it had to be done.  He told us all the side affects.  That she may not come out of it.  If she did she could have impairments, memory loss.  Her personality could be changed.  There was no doubt, all of that was better than losing her.  So into surgery she went.  Hours later we were able to see her when she was in recovery and believe it or not it was like a miracle, our old mom was back.  She was joking & laughing, it was like old times.  We even got the nurses in the ICU ward in on it, which was a relief for them.  One nurse said that she was going to allow us to stay after visiting hours b/c we were so much fun & also b/c she was used to her patients being non-responsive so this was a pleasant change for her.  Mom was so different.  Or actually she was so much the same, the same as she USED to be.  But the next day came the bad news.  The tumor was actually a metastasis from her lungs.  She was diagnosed with Stage IV small cell lung cancer, which had metastasized to her brain & other places.  Talk about devastation.  We didn't know what that meant, but I could tell from the response (or should I say non-response) from the doctor that it wasn't good.  They talked about radiation to the brain to get those to shrink & then possible chemotherapy.  It's all such a blur now.  It was so nice to be with her during that time, so nice to have the person back we had grown up with.  We had to wait for her head to heal a bit before  she could start the radiation & during that time I quit my job & moved in with my mom.  After a couple of weeks or so she started radiation, but one day while she was receiving her treatment her head started to leak at the incision site.  She went back to her surgeon & found out that her incision site had an infection in it and they had to start her on some pretty heavy antibiotics, therefore the radiation treatment had to stop and it just went downhill from there.
The picture at the top is of her after her surgery sitting in her chair on her porch reading from her daily devotional book.  This was the person we had been missing for so long.  She was so happy.  The picture below is at one of her follow up appointments after stopping her radiation treatments, she was very tired and hated going to these appointments. 
  
Unfortunately she was never able to resume her radiation treatments and on August 2, 2008 she passed away.  My sister and I were in bed with her when she died and it was the saddest day of my life.  But I know that one day we'll be together again in heaven where we'll never have to part from each other again.  
So, now to the point.  When my mom was sick we moved her in with us and she would sit outside for hours at a time.  It was summer time and she LOVED to be outdoors.  So every morning she'd have me wheel her outside in her wheelchair so that she could enjoy the outdoors.  Sometimes she would read, sometimes we would talk or I would read to her & then other times she would just sit & be silent.  It was during those silent times that I often wondered what she was thinking.  It made me think about my own life.  I knew that if she could she would have changed so many things about her life (or maybe she wouldn't have), but I knew that there had been things that she had wanted to pursue in her life that she never got to.  So after she died I decided then and there that I was no longer going to waste any more of the years that God gave me.  I was going to make a difference in this world and in order to do that I needed to go back to school & nursing was what I decided.  I knew that I wanted to help people and I knew that I wanted to make money while doing it and honestly I knew that I didn't want to be a nurse and I wasn't capable of going to medical school (I know that sounds contradictory to the title), but I knew right then & there that I DID want to be a nurse practitioner.  I've worked for many practitioner's over the years and I decided that I wanted to open my own clinic, maybe a couple and so that year I started on my journey that led me to my acceptance into the Spring 2012 nursing program where I have now completed my first semester and am proud to say am a SECOND semester nursing student.  I don't want to be at the end of my life and have any regrets, so even though I will be 40 this year & sometimes I feel discouraged by that, I just have to keep reminding myself that no matter what I'm doing the years are going to keep rolling by (God willing) so I might as well be doing something productive with them! 

I know that my mom would be SO proud of me and it's always bittersweet when I experience an accomplishment in school b/c I just wish that I could call her & share it with her, but one day she'll know all about it.  

So that's my short version of why I became a nurse(ing student).  Hope it wasn't too jumbled!  :)


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

MedSurg - Ortho Floor....

Ok can we say TOTAL snooze fest???  Today was our first official day on the MedSurg floor, but unfortunately since the professor figured we might be overwhelmed with over 15 pages of clinical paperwork due in one night, we weren't really able to do much (meaning no passing of meds).  We were basically put into the PCT roles.  So, pretty much it felt like last semester's clinical all over again, a bunch of elderly people, except for these ones have total hip replacements instead of just being old.   And let me tell you I can say with almost 100% assurance that working on the Ortho wing of the MedSurg floor is NOT where I see my future nursing self.  I mean maybe it was just my perception, but I saw the nurses basically in the same role as they were in the nursing home.  Going from patint room to patient room passing meds.  BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I hate that we don't get an ER rotation, I REALLY think that I would like that much more, except that as a new nurse I just don'…

I'm still alive!! Tomorrow is the NCLEX!

So as you can see I have GRADUATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Woohoo!!  I am SO happy that nursing school is over, but can we say holy terrified?  Tomorrow is the NCLEX & I feel thoroughly unprepared.  Fortunately our school provided us with the HURST Review and even though I have been studying this for about 2 weeks now I still feel completely terrified to actually take the test. 
Of my former classmates I know of one so far who has failed....so scary...
The rest of them are chugging along & passing on a daily basis, hopefully I will be one of them!

But to rewind, here are a few pics from graduation & my graduation party that my precious husband & sister threw for me:








As I said, tomorrow I take the NCLEX.  Honestly, up until I had the HURST review I really wasn't that nervous.  During the review the teacher advised us that as of 2012 they have changed the test to make it harder & the first time pass rate went from 94% to 88% (or something like that).  Um what?!…

Frazzle Razzle RN guest post...

One of my first nursing bloggy friends was Rachel and today she is guest posting on this here little 'ol blog.  If you read this blog you probably already read hers, but if not then head on over there.  Again without further ado here is my 2nd guest post:

Hello everyone, my name is Zazzy and I'm an avid reader of Candi's nursing school blog and I'm honored she's chosen to have me host for a day while she's out relaxing in the sun having fun! (I wish you would have taken me in your suitcase CANDI :D)

I have two more semesters of my own to complete before I graduate this May from nursing school, and I also have a fun blog detailing my journey. You can read more at Frazzledrazzlern.blogspot.com

In the meantime while going to nursing school I've been gaining experience as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) and I finally figured out a system that works for me. I was pretty disorganized when I first started and felt overwhelmed with not knowing what to do when a…